Shamanic Kink is not What You Think - Episode #1

Episode 1: Inner Child Work/Play

I really resonate with the notion that kinks are desired or lived experiences that exist outside of our realm of conventional, comfortable or usual expression. So what is the meaning of the kinks some of us have? Are they there just because the nature of Eros is simply to expand, experiment, shake things up, express and explore? Do they turn us on because it’s new, different, and fresh? Do they potentially hold a key to a place of deeper expression, a sense of more wholeness and a more embodied way of being, by guiding us to where transformation is available to us? Did Eros, as an expression of the intelligent life force, perhaps find a way to get our attention by creating an attraction to something that otherwise we would not be bothered to explore?

I believe all of the above are true, however I also don’t want to proclaim that all attractions are necessarily ‘intelligent’ or that all turn on means there’s a potential for transformation, healing, or real wholeness. I think it’s clear that sometimes we can get stuck in cycles of getting off on something that may have felt hurtful or not aligned in the past, but somehow offers us a space of familiarity and in a strange way, comfort. This is what Carolyn Elliott calls an ‘existential kink’.

So, I don’t mean to say all kinks or fantasies are meant to be acted out, let alone that they inherently serve some ‘sacred’ purpose. However, like everything in life, the way we approach them and engage with them is key to bringing balance, (self-) love, and ultimately wholeness and connection with the sacred.

A key piece that is often forgotten or bypassed in the realm of deep psychological play that BDSM offers, is that we all used to be children and that our inner children live on inside of us, with their joys, pains and ambitions. Our inner little ones also very often still carry a bunch of charge around unresolved themes of powerlessness, exclusion, not being seen or heard, or different forms of abuse they have had to live through. Why would we even *want* to bypass these tender beings and their loving, authentic, and inspired ways, and potentially re-live traumatic experiences, inside or outside of the container of a scene?

One of the most powerful and deeply nourishing parts of the Shamanic Kink journey is that we hold a container that invites true and authentic expression of our ‘inner little one’ aspects. Here, we co-create a fun and loving space to go deep with our own and each other’s little ones, fostering a community of loved and loving inner children held by their now mature inner parents.

This is a foundational piece in our training, because as our inner children find alignment and community, their safety opens doorways to the trust and surrender necessary to explore a wider range of transformational scenes. It goes without saying that scenes in the Shamanic Kink Immersion are intentional ritual spaces where aspects of ourselves come to seek healing, expression, attunement and love, held by another and by the group field.

Once our inner children are fully here, other aspects of ourselves may feel more comfortable bringing themselves to the table, so that they too may seek expression, love and healing. AND learn to show up as a more attuned and confident guide, Dom or space holder, offering deeper containment and presence to our own and another’s process.

In this sense, Shamanic Kink is not what you think. We ask everyone to bring their favorite stuffed animals to the training so that we can have a paw-tayyy, in a way that you have likely never experienced before :D

If you have any questions about this transformational work/play, or want to know more, please feel free to get in touch.